Nurture Your Relationship with Running to Build a Lifelong Bond

How's your relationship with running? It's like any other relationship in your life, with its ups and downs, good times and rough patches. Maybe you're not logging the miles you used to, or your runs feel shorter and less frequent. That's okay! Treat running like a loyal friend – even through the quieter periods – and you'll open the door to a lifetime of adventures together.

Why does it matter?

If you run long distances, you likely spend several hours every week running. That might be more quality time than you dedicate to most people in your life! Not every run will be amazing, but when you see the value that running brings to your life – the comfort, the constant, the inspiration – it becomes a steadfast friend, always there for you.

The true magic happens when you and running are in sync.

That's when you find a lasting connection and a deep sense of joy. It's this connection that fuels your goals and propels you towards sustained personal growth.

How did you two meet?

Let’s go back to the beginning: how did you come to find running? If you remember your very first run or the decision that led to your starting to run, what was that introduction like? What made the first impression memorable?

Think of starting to run like making a new friend.

You take your time to figure each other out from a distance, get to know each other better, and – as long as those initial experiences are positive enough – eventually form a bond. 

But where do new runners stumble? 

Often that’s when the initial introduction is a negative experience. Maybe you ran too hard, set yourself a goal that wasn’t attainable, or expected running to instantly transform your life. And so running was too challenging, it didn't deliver on its promises, and you lost interest.

Here's the thing: it's not the running. 

True, not everyone enjoys running and not everyone has to. But usually it’s not about running, and it’s not about you not being suited to running – more likely, it’s your expectations. Running can be such a gift, but it’s not going to turn you into an instant marathoner, solve all your problems, give you much of a runner’s high on day one, or make you lose 50 lbs (it might – and it might not). Running, at first, is hard. Even years down the line, running is still hard a lot of the time. 

Brand new or returning runner? 

If you’re still new to running, or you’ve been away for a long time and you need a reintroduction, approach these first weeks and months with openness, without expectation or prejudice. Give yourself grace, and be kind with your expectations of running. Take your time to get (re)acquainted and ease yourself into it slowly. It will be a far better experience and more likely to stick.

From buddies to best friends

By now, you decided you enjoy the company of running and stuck with it beyond the first few months of run/walking, maybe a 5K or two, and found your rhythm with a training routine. You’re starting to know each other pretty well, enough to figure out you like spending time together – finding that special connection is making your life a bit more exciting.

Time to let yourself get carried away!

This is when you start dreaming big, setting goals, and maybe even signing up for your first half marathon. Running becomes a source of accomplishment and pride, and you’re excited to see what you can achieve together. It’s like the honeymoon phase in a new relationship, where everything feels exciting and full of potential.

Finding your “sole” mate. 

You and running are ready to start exploring new things together. Maybe it’s venturing out on longer runs, discovering new trails, or joining a running group to meet others with a similar interest. You share triumphs and setbacks, pushing each other to be better and celebrating milestones along the way. There's a sense of purpose and a feeling of belonging that comes from this newfound connection with running. It's starting to become a part of your identity.

This is a special time where the joy of running is fresh and the possibilities seem endless. You may be discovering your competitive side, as improvements come relatively easily. Embrace this feeling, because it's the foundation for a long and rewarding relationship with running, just like the strong bond you share with your partner or best friend.

Through thick and thin

Ultimately, your relationship with running grows and deepens – though let's be honest, the initial thrill might fade a bit. By now, you're in it for the long haul. You + Running 4ever – a bond built to last, for better or worse. It’s not easy every day, and you may have to overcome challenges and get through a few rough patches, but just like a good marriage, you work through it and the love remains. It's that comfortable, contented feeling of a relationship that's stood the test of time.

Running is like your oldest, most loyal friend. 

You may not see each on a regular basis, but you know they'll always be there, no matter how much time has passed. You're honest with each other, you know each other's quirks inside and out. Running is the same: a constant presence, always there to support you. And if you need to step away from it for a while – whether that’s due to injury, life getting crazy, or your body or your mind needing a break – running won’t hold a grudge. It will be waiting with open arms when you're ready to return.

The best part? 

Running can give you so much when you no longer question if you belong together. You know you do. It’s not exciting all the time – but learn to enjoy the mundane and the everyday, and running will surprise you in new ways to strengthen your bond. You’ll find new destinations to explore together and set fresh challenges to conquer. New people will come into your life through the mutual relationship you have with running, and some of those people will become an intrinsic part of your running life too, enriching it further.

How are you and running doing right now? 

Think about how you nurture relationships with your best friend, partner or spouse, and how you can bring your strengths in those human connections into your relationship with running.

Love running with the honesty and loyalty you reserve for the very best people in your life, and it will love you back unconditionally and help you build a lifelong commitment!

---

About the author:

Heini Tallent is an RRCA Level 2 certified distance running coach and licensed massage therapist with a holistic, client-centered approach to coaching. She helps recreational runners aged 40ish and up train with more confidence, feel more motivated, and discover sustainable ways of making running a healthy and enjoyable lifelong habit. She is currently training for her first Boston Marathon and studying to become a functional medicine certified health coach in 2025.